Love, marriage and the church

A question posed from the Lexington Herald-Leader on their "FAITH BLOG" for the month of February was:

"To have and to hold, from this day forward, until death do us part." That could be a really long time and can include sickness or health, wealth or poverty. Not every two people who want to get married should. What do you tell them? How do you counsel couples who want to part ways? What is the future for traditional ideas of marriage?

You may go on-line at: kentucky.com and register (join) to read all the faith blog articles/responses and follow the blogs of those who are currently members; you may also join the faith blog network.  My reply to this question was as follows:

The Bible teaching on marriage is clear.  The marriage institution was created by God and intended for man’s happiness. It is stated in Genesis 2:24, “For this reason a man shall leave his father and his mother, and be joined to his wife; and they shall become one flesh.”  Jesus, in Matthew 19:6 stated of this, “What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder.”

Furthermore, we find in Hebrews 13:4 – “Marriage is to be held in honor among all, and the marriage bed is to be undefiled; for fornicators and adulterers God will judge.”

While God instituted marriage for man’s benefit, it is not a requirement for salvation. In other words, one does not HAVE to marry.  (Matthew 19:12 – “For there are eunuchs, that were so born from their mother's womb: and there are eunuchs, that were made eunuchs by men: and there are eunuchs, that made themselves eunuchs for the kingdom of heaven's sake. He that is able to receive it, let him receive it.”)

If however, marriage is entered, then the Bible is clear as to its duration, (Romans 7).  God’s instructions regarding marriage is applicable to everyone, i.e., no one is exempt from them.  There is nothing in the scriptures that suggest that one’s spiritual condition before God has a bearing on the matter.  Again, 1 Corinthians 7 describes a marriage of a believer and a non-believer (see also 1 Peter 3:1-5). 

Divorce is also legislated by the Bible.  There are two reasons for which a marriage may be dissolved: physical death (Romans 7) and adultery (Matthew 5 & 19).

In view of the significance and role of marriage, CARE must be taken in the selection of a mate.  This is where the problem of broken homes, abuse and neglect originates: disrespect for God’s laws regarding marriage. 

Much more insight on the importance of selecting a mate may be seen from God’s instructions to the children of Israel regarding the intermarriage with the Canaanite people (Deuteronomy 7:3-4- "neither shalt thou make marriages with them; thy daughter thou shalt not give unto his son, nor his daughter shalt thou take unto thy son. For he will turn away thy son from following me, that they may serve other gods: so will the anger of Jehovah be kindled against you, and he will destroy thee quickly." (see also Exodus 34:16; Joshua 23:12-13; 1 Kings 11:2; Ezra 9:2)  This is especially seen from Solomon’s marriages in 1 Kings 11.  God’s concern is obvious from this passage.  The salvation of our souls!

What does the future hold? That depends upon whether preachers preach the truth from the Bible on marriage, divorce, and re-marriage.  If their concern is more over a drop in membership, they will proclaim a “perverted” gospel (Galatians 1:6-9).  If their love for God and for the souls is their motive, then they will boldly proclaim God’s will on the subject and, in so doing, give witness of their genuine trust in God to defend His cause.

People’s convictions are developed from what goes forth from the pulpits, for the proverbial apple does not fall far from the tree.

RDB